Date: 2011-04-01 12:54 am (UTC)
I definitely like that there's more of an overall sense of creepiness (eeriness? both?) in this draft. I'm, um, confused about the last line? I like it, and it's creepy and really well written, but I guess I don't understand what he's talking about. Unless he's implying that when he visited Samuel, he turned into a sniveling coward instantly and did everything Bathory said, while Mira has been a disobeying PITA, as Dominik is now being? I'm just taking for granted that this will probably become clear in upcoming pages and staying along for the ride. :)
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