I think what I like most about your atmospheric details is how you have the guts to leave them so unexplained. Like, the pool of blood - we don't know what it's about, it's just there. Or the candles earlier, and the repeating hallways. And you never bother to explain it. Very cool. It helps create a the feeling of world beyond the storyline.
If the manservant is under Erzsebet's control, who ordered him down there? Or, well... I guess I'll wait to find out more. Like, what on earth she actually meant with that stellar line. ;)
Mira's "I won't leave you" seemed a little pat - like, there's probably a hundred movies with that exact line.... Maybe this is the sort of thing you put down in a first draft and are going to get back to and I shouldn't be bugging you about the details, but... just in case. It sorta jumped out at me.
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2010-11-19 04:48 am (UTC)I think what I like most about your atmospheric details is how you have the guts to leave them so unexplained. Like, the pool of blood - we don't know what it's about, it's just there. Or the candles earlier, and the repeating hallways. And you never bother to explain it. Very cool. It helps create a the feeling of world beyond the storyline.
If the manservant is under Erzsebet's control, who ordered him down there? Or, well... I guess I'll wait to find out more. Like, what on earth she actually meant with that stellar line. ;)
Mira's "I won't leave you" seemed a little pat - like, there's probably a hundred movies with that exact line.... Maybe this is the sort of thing you put down in a first draft and are going to get back to and I shouldn't be bugging you about the details, but... just in case. It sorta jumped out at me.