Are the folks who read loglines adjective-adverse? My English teachers were but it seems if you want to draw someone in, a few might not come amiss. Also too long, but here's my suggestion:
"In the castle on the mountain lurks an ancient evil. For years the villagers have cowered in fear, but now one young mother has had enough. She will confront the dark Count, and put an end to his reign of terror."
I think the young mother bit is good cause it defines her a bit more and puts an popular emotional hook in play. Be sure and let us know what you send in! Exciting!
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branchandroot
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Date: 2012-10-12 11:46 am (UTC)"In the castle on the mountain lurks an ancient evil. For years the villagers have cowered in fear, but now one young mother has had enough. She will confront the dark Count, and put an end to his reign of terror."
I think the young mother bit is good cause it defines her a bit more and puts an popular emotional hook in play. Be sure and let us know what you send in! Exciting!